Reform the Whole System

There has been a lot of internet chatter, especially on the blogs I visit, about the newly recommended  changes to the MultiEthnic Placement Act (MEPA). The report, and the myriad of media articles and interviews that followed, have offered few new insights (for me)–but I was grateful to hear that the New York Times article really spoke to the parents in a family I know. They are now looking into moving to a racially diverse community for the sake of their transracially adopted children.

I received several phone calls last week from friends and family members letting me know that National Public Radio was holding a call-in show about transracial adoption. (I caught only a moment of one mother talking about ‘doing her tenth adoption,’ and how her kids were ‘voting on whether they should get a chocolate baby or a vanilla one, or one that was both’. Call-in shows are always dicey on what you’re going to hear, but I had to turn it off after that.) One of my family members listened to the whole show and then wanted to know what I thought about requiring additional training for transracially adopting parents (specifically White parents adopting Black kids out of foster care), since one of the ‘adoption experts’ on NPR said adding training requirements only left more Black kids in foster care longer. Let me be clear: I am all for special/additional training for potential transracially adoptive parents. Kids don’t just need to ‘get out of foster care into adoptive homes’; if they absolutely cannot be placed with anyone in their biological family, children in foster care need to move into permanent families with prepared parents.

Adoptive parenting is more complex than parenting birth children. Transracially adoptive parenting is an additional layer of complexity. White people/parents in particular have not often considered many of the race and racism-related issues that will be crucial to the growth and development of a child of color. If White potential adoptive parents balk at additional training before a Black child is even in their home, is there any reason to believe these same parents will be willing or able to rise to the multiple unforeseen challenges (both related and unrelated to race) that their family will face after their child is home?

Adults who become parents completely on purpose (which includes all non-relative adoptive parents) hold total responsibility to do everything they can upfront (before a child arrives in their family) to prepare for the new experiences this particular child will bring with them. This includes everything about the child, especially things the parent is unfamiliar with: medical conditions, abuse history, health issues, physical or educational disabilities, cultural practices, and–yes–racial differences. Growing up Black in the United States is not the same as growing up White, and White potential adoptive parents must realize that an additional session of training is the very least they can do to begin to educate themselves about the experiences of their soon-to-be child.

The articles I’ve been reading that most interest me speak to the larger issue of why there are so many children in foster care and in need of adoptive families. These articles begin to tackle the huge sticky overlapping topics of racism and poverty–specifically as they relate to adoption and to foster care. Check out the articles and blog posts linked below. There are lot of great thinkers writing right now on all aspects of transracial adoption. I’ve included a key paragraph or two from each piece.

• Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute Policy Brief on Finding Families for African American Children: The Role of Race and Law in Adoption from Foster Care:

While transracial adoptions can provide much-needed homes for boys and girls who may not otherwise have them, it is important to address the potential challenges in this growing practice in order to best serve everyone involved, especially the children.

In order for children of color to be placed with families who can meet their long-term needs, consideration must be given to needs arising from racial/ethnic differences. Consequently, when workers choose permanent families for children, and when they seek to prepare and support them in addressing the children’s needs, race must be one consideration - such as promoting connection of the child to adults and children from their own racial/ethnic group, developing a positive racial/ethnic identity, and learning to deal with discrimination they may experience. Sound social work practice to accomplish these goals is severely impeded under current federal law and policy.

• New York Times article De-Emphasis on Race in Adoption is Criticized:

Minority children adopted into white households face special challenges and white parents need preparation and training for what might lie ahead.

Transracial adoption itself does not produce psychological or other social problems in children, but these children often face major challenges as the only person of color in an all-white environment, trying to cope with being different.

• Peter’s Cross Station post Asking the Wrong Question:

Ironically, one of the most important things white parents of Black children need to understand is the racism that put their children in their arms. To parent a Black child, you must look that racism square in the face, see that you have profited incalculably from it and swear to fight it with all your strength for the rest of your life; to do everything in your power to create a world in which a child such as yours would never again need to end up in arms such as yours.

• Resist Racism post Considerations of Race & comment (#10, by panracial on May 28):

I encourage all people adopting from foster care to adopt the least adoptable children that they could love unconditionally - children with real special needs, sibling groups (including half siblings), teen children (including very old teens), children with behavioral problems, complex histories, or who have been abused or neglected (even severely), and black boys who are the least picked (regardless of other factors and especially if their complexions are dark) are most in need of homes. I encourage people not to automatically adopt a five year old biracial girls - chances are, if you don’t adopt them someone else will, but the teen black brothers may never get picked if you don’t offer them a home.

• Feministe post Too Poor to Parent (emphasis is mine):

All of my white-girl middle-class solutions don’t work across the board. Yes, contraception access is crucial - but it’s not going to stop a teenage girl who wants to get pregnant because for her, it’s the best option. Yes, it’s better for everyone to have health care, wholesome food, and a good education with every opportunity in the world available to them - but that isn’t reality, and until it is, we can’t be blaming individuals who are doing the best they can with all the odds stacked against them.

Children are not objects of privilege that only the rich are entitled to. Women who are good, loving moms but who can’t afford certain luxuries - or even certain basics - don’t deserve to suffer the burden of our societal failures.

• Harlow’s Monkey post What I Was Trying to Say:

We/they/all of us need to look at the underlying reasons why children are parent-less and maybe that preventative part makes us overwhelmed. We might feel we can’t eliminate poverty, or war. We can’t control natural disasters. We aren’t able to cure AIDS. We haven’t gotten rid of chemical dependency or mental illnesses. But we can take in a child - that much we can do.

• Multi-Ethnic Placement Act(MEPA): full text, including the InterEthnic provision of 1996, MEPA Internal Evaluation Instrument, and Protection from Racial Discrimination in Adoption and Foster Care

The Adoption Industry, Part 1: Demand

In exploring the industry of adoption, it is fundamental to first explain why there is a market for children in the first place. Why do adults choose to adopt babies and children who are biologically unrelated to them?

1. Infertility: A heterosexual couple is unable to create and/or carry a biological child. This includes secondary infertility (infertility after the birth of one or more biological children.)
2. Need help: Parents are unable to have a child without reproductive assistance. This includes infertile couples that do not wish to use medical assistance, lesbian and gay couples, and single parents.
3. Health: Concerns about passing on a genetic disorder in the mother’s or father’s family. Pregnancy could cause the health of the mother to be seriously impaired. The mother and/or family have been exposed to certain elements (chemical, medical, etc.) that may cause birth defects.
4. Choosing gender: A family with two or more biological children of the same gender adopt in order to parent a child of the opposite gender. The adopted child is almost always a girl. (These families usually choose international adoption because the children are already born, although some domestic adoption agencies allow adoptive parents to specify gender.)
5. Personal beliefs: Parents who adopt for religious or philosophical reasons. This includes preferential adopters.

The domestic infant adoption system caters to one group of prospective adoptive parents: heterosexual, White, middle and upper class, infertile, married couples (the great majorities of groups 1 & 3, and much of group 2). This system has broadened itself a bit; certain agencies now accommodate same-sex couples and/or single parents (mostly mothers), and a handful of infant adoption agencies actively recruit parents/families of color (The Cradle and Pact are two of the biggest nonsectarian names). Still, virtually all agencies are focused on families who cannot have children without assistance (groups 1, 2, & 3), and many agencies actually will not work with fertile couples.

Adoption fees rule out most potential adoptive parents who are not at least middle-class. Current domestic infant adoption fees for a healthy* baby, of any race, usually run in the $18,000-$30,000 range. This includes homestudy, paperwork, agency fees, legal fees, and living expenses for a pregnant woman. Travel costs, medical expenses (for baby and mother), and legal complications can push the cost even higher. International adoption fees vary by country, but costs often run higher than domestic adoption. About 40% of international adoptions and 20% of domestic infant adoptions cost more than $30,000.

*A note on the domestic infant adoption system definition of a healthy baby. A baby who is classified as ‘healthy’ includes a baby who was prenatally drug and/or alcohol exposed, was born prematurely, has no birthfather medical/social information (i.e. ‘unknown birthfather’), has a birthfamily history of moderate mental health problems and/or a birthfamily history of moderate genetically-transferable medical conditions. When a baby appears to be healthy at birth (no apparent physical, mental, or serious medical handicaps), that baby is part of the mainstream adoptive placement system, including standard fees. Fees are often reduced substantially for infants who are born with clear disabilities, have been prenatally exposed to extremely high levels of alcohol and/or illegal drugs, or have two birthparents who have mental health diagnoses.

When calculating adoption costs, there is the often misunderstood $10,000 federal adoption tax credit. The funds from this tax credit are not available until after an adoption has been legally finalized (usually 6-8 months after the placement of a child); adoptive parents must come up with all the money for adoption fees and expenses up front. In addition, this is a non-refundable tax credit; the tax credit is deducted from the federal tax a family owes over a period of up to five years. In adoption literature, it is often noted that a family is eligible for the adoption tax credit unless a family’s income exceeds federal restrictions (meaning: modified adjusted gross income of more than $204,000). It is never noted that if a family does not make enough money to owe any federal income tax (total income of less than $45,000/year for a family of four) the family does not qualify for the adoption tax credit. If a family owes less than $2,000/year in federal income tax, they will not receive the full adoption tax credit ($2,000 x 5 years = $10,000). NOTE: 4% of families in the U.S. make more than $200,000/year, while 40% of families in the United States make less than $50,000/year.

The majority of prospective adoptive parents waiting in the domestic adoption system fit the description of the people to which the system caters: White, middle/upper class, infertile, married, heterosexual couples. The great majority of these prospective parents are seeking a certain type of baby: usually White (at least 80%), and often also with a very healthy** social/medical family history (**very healthy meaning not only apparently healthy at birth, but also including not prenatally drug or alcohol exposed, no mental illness or major medical issues in either side of the birthfamily, full-term delivery, birthparents not in prison, and often more). Even so, White newborns with health issues, premature birth, mild to moderate birthfamily medical/social history issues, ‘unknown’ birthfather, or minor disabilities are still very desirable to these prospective adoptive parents.

The domestic infant adoption system does not easily accommodate adoptive parents who are outside the target prospective adoptive parent population. (The target adoptive-parent-client population excludes portions of groups 1-4, and all of group 5.) In addition, if a prospective adoptive parent is prepared to care for a child of any race who has been prenatally drug and/or alcohol exposed or has moderate to serious, multiple, or unknown birthfamily medical/social issues, why would they choose domestic infant adoption ($18,000-$30,000 or more in fees) instead of foster care adoption (often less than $2,000 in fees)? The more open a prospective adoptive family is, the less likely they are part of the domestic infant adoption system.

Prospective adoptive parents who fall outside the targeted adoptive parent population (especially working or lower-middle class families, People of Color, and fertile couples) are more likely to choose foster adoption or toddler/older child international adoption-for many different reasons. Because they have family or personal connections to another country. Because they have lived abroad or traveled extensively. Because they know what it’s like to be involved with Child and Family Services. Because they themselves were in foster care. Because they are not afraid (rightly or not) of the issues and history children in foster care, older children, and/or institutionalized children may bring home. Because they have already raised their biological children from infancy, and would prefer to parent older children. Because they want to ‘help’ a child who has less opportunity for a family. Because they know how many children of color are in foster care or orphanages–and how long these children wait for a family.

This is where the domestic adoption ‘market’ becomes extremely unbalanced. Prospective adoptive parents are overwhelmingly White, and they are seeking White babies. (However, it must be noted that Black American families adopt at twice the rate of White American families.) There is a racial hierarchy of adoption. Certain babies, through the unearned privilege of their racial ancestry, are easier to place in an adoptive family. From most prospective adoptive families waiting to least families waiting, the racial hierarchy ranges from light to dark, from undeveloped White American history to most complex; the newborns who are most quickly matched with an adoptive family have White (also known as European American) ancestry, then Asian ancestry, Hispanic/Latino ancestry, Native American ancestry, and finally Black ancestry. In adoption, girls are also easier to place than boys; thus, the easiest child to find an adoptive family for is a White girl, the most difficult is a Black boy. Biracial and multiracial children are shuttled to their ‘darkest’ heritage in the racial hierarchy. Thus, finding an adoptive family for a biracial Black/White boy is similar to finding a family for a ‘full’ Black boy (full Black meaning two Black-identifying biological parents). Within the infant adoption system, it is still common to read or hear descriptions of pregnant women that include the shade of their skin, or even the fair skin-tone of a newborn biracial baby. (The latter could only be information offered by White professionals with no experience with infants/people of color.)

As long as the practice and process of adoption remains an ‘industry’, prospective adoptive parents will be regarded as ‘customers’. In such a system, infants, children, and mothers will necessarily continue to be viewed and treated as merchandise, objects to be marketed to the paying clientele (as in the misleading ‘light-skinned’ biracial newborn). It is an oft-repeated phrase in many corners of the adoption system nowadays that adoption agencies are looking for families for children, not children for families. This statement must become the blanket truth about adoption.

Following segments will address supply in the adoption system (including domestic infants, children in foster care, international infants/toddlers, international older children, and systemic birthparent/family coercion), whether adoption is necessary (including what can be done to lower the ‘need’ for adoptive families), adoption ethics and the rights of mothers (including pregnant women), specific coverage of foster care adoption and international adoption (including a more in-depth exploration of the reasons parents choose different types of adoption), gender choice in adoption, and transracial adoption (including the racial and country hierarchies within transracial adoption).

Please feel free to ask questions in the comments; I will try to address them within the upcoming series segments. A full bibliography for the entire series will be available.

A meme of sorts

I’ve been tagged twice in the last month, and I haven’t responded (felt kind of like a chain letter, and a lot of person-related questions). Instead, I’ve tweaked the requested lists and added a few more relevant (changed favorite TV shows to favorite books, since we don’t have a TV) items of my own. WARNING: There are a lot of links . . . Here goes:

What I Am Most Passionate About (these days):

• My family, especially my children: Jaja (6), Rico (5), Gretel (3.5), and Teri (2)
• Antiracist Activism
• Social Justice in the United States, and in the world
• Adoption Reform
• Multicultural and Anti-Bias Education
• Organic Food and Real Food
• Multiracial Families
• Open Adoption
• Multiracial People

Musical Artists I Could (and sometimes do) Listen To All Day:

• Ben Harper
• Gillian Welch
• Lenny Kravitz
• Ani DiFranco
• Nick Ogawa
• Shakira (in Spanish)

New Music I’m Listening To (on repeat):

• Wyclef Jean ~ Carnival Vol. II: Memiors of An Immigrant
• Soundtrack from the movie Once
• My friend Katherine Quinn (in her pre-mama days)

Old Favorite Books:

• Childhood: A Multicultural View 
• A Question of Balance: Artists and Writers on Motherhood
• Everyday Acts Against Racism
• The Unschooling Handbook
• The Family Nobody Wanted (Helen Doss)
• Bird by Bird (Anne Lamott)
• Natural Childhood
• Beach Music (Pat Conroy)
• The Wedding (Dorothy West)

New Favorite Books:

• Why Do I Love These People? (Po Bronson) 
• A Right to Be Hostile (Aaron McGruder)
• Little House on a Small Planet
• Some of my Best Friends: Writings on Interracial Friendships
• Strong Hearts, Inspired Minds: 21 Artists Who are Mothers Tell Their Stories 
• Hope Meadows
• Rethinking Columbus: The Next 500 Years
• I Dream a World: Portraits of Black Women Who Changed America

Multiracial Family Blogs I Visit (just about) Everyday:

• This Woman’s Work ~ Black/White/Jewish/Bio/Adoptive/Writer-Mom Family, with 2 children
• Johnson-McCormick Family ~ Black/White/Haitian/Adoptive/Bio/2 Career Family, with 2.5 children
• The Brodie Bunch ~ Latino/White/Bio/Adoptive/Special Needs/Single Mom Family, with 39 children
• Heart, Mind and Seoul ~ Korean/White/Bio/Adoptive/Adult Adoptee Family, with 2 children
• Reading, Writing, Living~ Asian/White/Bio/Adult Adoptee/Writer-Mom Family, with 2 children
• Peter’s Cross Station ~ Black/White/2 Mom/Adoptive Family, with 2 children
• Los Angelista’s Guide to the Pursuit of Happiness ~ Black/White/Bio/Writer-Mom Family, with 2 children
• Karen Cheng’s Little Snippets of Life~ Australian/Chinese/White/Bio Family, with 2+ children

Other Daily Stops:

• Racialicious 
• Anti-Racist Parent
• Resist Racism

Blogs I visit once a week (or so): 

• A Family Affair ~ Asian Mom-to-be
• Daddy Diaries ~ Latino/Black/2 Dad/Foster/Adoptive Family, with 1 child
• Culpability ~ Black/White/Ethiopian/Adoptive Family, with 2 children
• Harlow’s Monkey~ Korean/White/Adult Adoptee/Social Worker-Mom Family, with (I think) 2 children
• Ignore the Crazy ~ Black/White/Bio/Adoptive/Special Needs Family, with 3.5 children
• Jocelyn’s Stories ~ Black/White/Bio/Writer-Mom Family, with 1 child
• My American Meltingpot ~ Black/White/Spanish/Bio/Writer-Mom Family, with 2 children
• Scraps By Nobody ~ Black/White/Bio/Adoptive/Special Needs Family, with 6+ children
• Process ~ Social Worker in the Foster Care System
• Mixed Race America

So Funny I Forgot to Laugh

As suspected, this has turned out to be a hoax after all. It’s not clear if it’s a joke, or if it’s a misguided attempt to draw attention to the messed up adoption industry–and the immense need for adoption reform. The same things about the website are exploitative, even if it’s not real. And the same things still concern me. I think Mia says it best:

The sad truth of the matter is that this website isn’t that far off the mark of what goes on in the adoption industry every single day. Maybe that’s in part why I find it so entirely disturbing.

Please also read these posts:

• Paula’s view as both an adult adoptee and an adoptive parent
• Suz’s perspective as a reunited first mother and an activist in the adoption reform movement

Please Tell Me This Isn’t Real

If you haven’t heard about it yet, please allow yourself to become completely ill and check out this Medical Adoptions website (hat tip to Paula and Mia). Their tag-line is “The Organs You Need - The Home They Deserve”. This is a purported international adoption agency offering ‘completely legal’ adoptions for the specified purpose of the adoptee being an organ donor to a parent or child in the adoptive family. Tissue matching is reportedly done at the beginning of the adoption process.

The consensus so far is that this is all a hoax. (The site states they have an office in the Appalachian mountains to service their U.S. clients. And that adoptions will be completed in 9-28 days.) Even if it is supposed to be some sort of political-statement-joke–I’m not laughing.

The scary thing (which one?) is that this idea is not that far fetched. Whoever made the site knows a lot about adoption: international adoption law, child trafficking law, stereotypical adoptive parents fears/concerns. The scary thing is that I’m not sure it’s fake. The site has already been forwarded to State Representatives in at least three states (soon to be four as soon as I’m done here).

The kicker? The fees are racially stratified. Race ’preference’ and adoption, hand-in-hand yet again. Here is a promotional quote (bold added):

We also afford parents the luxury of selecting the appropriate adoption package from our classes of Platinum, Gold, Bronze and Onyx. Some people don’t care, but if you’re buying in, you might as well get exactly what you want. I prefer pasta to rice, and I’m always willing to pay extra for it. Then again, I prefer Kung Pow to Roast Beef, and I’m willing to pay the difference for that as well. Whether it’s tissue or your heir, you deserve the right to make such a choice, and we not only allow it, but price it accordingly based strictly on supply and demand. These things can be critical to some parent beneficiaries, so we extend that option to our patrons.

My question: How can we change the way children are treated in this world, and how adoptions are conducted, so that there would be no question in my mind that this is simply a sick and twisted farce?